When I attended college, my friend Mark had a theory about self-improvement.
He posited that we all have character defects, things about ourselves that we wanted to change or areas for improvement.
However you wanted to phrase it.
Spending, eating, drinking, no exercise, sex, etc.
Pick your vice.
Mark thought that the issue with working on an area for improvement was that when you focused on one area, the other areas magnified.
Became more problematic.
That you could not fix everything at once.
He likened it to the carnival game of whack a mole.
You try to whack one mole and another mole pops up quickly.
I recall this theory often.
Especially when I start working on one area to improve myself.
Perhaps the trick is not living in extremes.
Where we are fighting a flaw or completely ignoring it.
Ruling it or being ruled by it.
Balance is what we are after.
Checking in on each of our coping mechanisms.
Acknowledging their power, doing what we can to overcome without going off the deep end.
For today, let us sit with our issues.
Give them their due.
Refuse to concede to them.
But to not let our new behavior take us off in some extreme direction.
Where everything else falls apart.